Here is the porcupine we saw on our hike yesterday! I think he’s a baby or youngster. #capelookout

Here is the porcupine we saw on our hike yesterday! I think he’s a baby or youngster. #capelookout

It always feels like you are the luckiest person in the world when you get sunshine & 75 degrees on the Oregon Coast. #capelookout #loveyouoregon in all weather but the sun was nice!

It always feels like you are the luckiest person in the world when you get sunshine & 75 degrees on the Oregon Coast. #capelookout #loveyouoregon in all weather but the sun was nice!

I mean, seriously, #oregon?  #nofilterneeded #loveyouoregon #capelookout

I mean, seriously, #oregon? #nofilterneeded #loveyouoregon #capelookout

Byron and the sea #capelookout #oregon

Byron and the sea #capelookout #oregon

At the end of the world. #capelookout #oregon #loveyouoregon

At the end of the world. #capelookout #oregon #loveyouoregon

Two hours and one work day till…

Vacation!  One of the best three syllable words I can think of!

Wednesday will be catching up on laundry, prepping for a mini-yurt camping trip & NYC trip, and then happy hour/dinner out at our favorite neighborhood restaurant, Firehouse (wood-fired oven pizzas, yes!).

On Thursday, we’re doing a quick jaunt to the coast to spend the night at a yurt (!).  I’ve been wanting to do this for years and years, and finally booked one super last minute.  We’ll be at Cape Lookout in Tillamook which means we must stop at the Tillamook Cheese Factory, of course!

Friday will be a bit of beach exploring before heading back to town.  Saturday will be last minute NYC trip prep and packing before my flight on Sunday morning to NYC!  So excited to get away and to see my mom & niece experience the city for their first visit.  We’ll fly back Thursday, so I’ll have a nice 3-day weekend to ease back in before the work week. 

It’s going to be a wonderful but busy 12 days and so happy to finally have a break from work!

“Shame is real pain. The importance of social acceptance and connection is reinforced by our brain chemistry, and the pain that results from social rejection and disconnection is real pain. In a 2011 study funded by the National Institute of Mental Health and by the National Institute on Drug Abuse, researchers found that, as far as the brain is concerned, physical pain and intense experiences of social rejection hurt in the same way.”

From Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead by Brene Brown. 

This quote (and this book in general) came into my life at the just right time and has been immense comfort in dealing with my disappointment at work recently.

I was betrayed by someone who is not just a coworker but a friend & mentor, my trust blown open, and no wonder I’m feeling such profound sadness and grief.  It’s tough in the best of circumstances for me to be vulnerable and put myself out there & then get rejected.  I’ve been struggling with understanding why this friend would make a choice knowing they would hurt me so.  I’ve felt shame about expecting a different outcome and that coworkers would judge me for not getting the job.

It made me feel better to read this quote about this study and realize that is why this outcome literally (and I mean it - like the pit of my stomach) hurts me. I hate to sound dramatic, but I really can’t remember something that has hurt me or upset me this much in many, many, many years.  It’s really shocked me to feel this rush of feelings and has been a lot to process.

If you have a hard time being vulnerable (I think most of us do) or deal with self shaming (again: most of us - especially women - have that little voice in our head constantly), I recommend this book.  You can also check out her TED talks as they carry many of the same messages:  HERE and HERE.

Do you still have your crown?
I’m sure it’s probably in a closet *somewhere* at my parents’ house (along with all my Babysitters Club books, Sassy magazines, and Barbies).  I haven’t seen it in over a decade though since my parents redid my old bedroom and moved into it. 
Fergie was the captain of the rugby team. I didn’t even get asked to prom. No way we would have dated in high school
My class was like 300. But even so, I was not popular so…. Jeff, however, was prom king. Pretty proud of myself for landing him. Haha!
Way to move up the social ladder, ladies. J/K!!!  Seriously though, thank god that high school isn’t really real life, and those generally aren’t the “best days of our life.”  You couldn’t pay me enough to relive those years (esp junior high).  Voting for titles like homecoming queen and prom king that really didn’t mean much.  Sports was everything.  Caring so much about what others thought and said.  Yuck!

One of the worst feelings

Is meeting the person that got the job you wanted. (And was promised/offered six months ago).

Forced myself to be friendly as it’s not her fault. But damn it sucks.

aldrivel replied to your photo:Throwback Thursday, thanks to my dad for sharing…

Omg you were homecoming queen?? *bows down* ;)

Ha, thanks for the respect.

I must mention my high school class was very, very small - we had about 40 people actually graduate, I think.  My cousin was football homecoming queen (and my sister was a bb homecoming princess 9 yrs before me), so I guess it ran in the family??

Throwback Thursday, thanks to my dad for sharing on FB today.  This is me at my high school’s basketball homecoming right before I was crowned the honor of Homecoming Queen (whatever that means! still not sure what the qualifications were).  Yes, it’s true, I was a homecoming queen.  Also a cheerleader.  All the confessions.  
Also, I adored that dress. I actually wore it at least 3 times - prom, then homecoming, then a Youth & Gov’t banquet.  Not so sure about the navy pantyhose though. 

Throwback Thursday, thanks to my dad for sharing on FB today.  This is me at my high school’s basketball homecoming right before I was crowned the honor of Homecoming Queen (whatever that means! still not sure what the qualifications were).  Yes, it’s true, I was a homecoming queen.  Also a cheerleader.  All the confessions. 

Also, I adored that dress. I actually wore it at least 3 times - prom, then homecoming, then a Youth & Gov’t banquet.  Not so sure about the navy pantyhose though. 

My weekend so far

Grilled chicken tacos with guacamole for dinner last night

House of Cards, stout beers, & peanut butter chocolate ice cream followed.

9+ hrs of sleep

Gym & Trader Joe’s

Leftover chicken in quesadillas for lunch.

A nap.

To come: cupcakes the boyfriend brought home, mac&cheese w/smoked gouda for dinner.

This is only the first day of the 3 day weekend!!